From the local rag...GWENT MPs’ expenses rose around 19 per cent in 2007/2008, with claims totalling almost £890,000.

Figures of MPs allowances and travel expenses were released by the UK parliament yesterday and show Newport East MP Jessica Morden claimed the most with a total of £167,060.

Ms Morden’s claims rose by around 25 per cent from £133,592 in 2006/2007, which she said was due to unused funds from that period being carried over into 2007/2008.

She said: “In this particular year, the fees office allowed me to transfer money I didn’t spend in the previous so I could use it on extra office provision, following the birth of my child.

“The money was spent on staffing and extra office provision. I take great pride in both, as they are there to serve the people of Newport East, and I want my constituents to benefit from the best service I can give them.”

MPs can ask for funds to be carried forward or draw an advance from the next year’s budget, but it is only allowed for specific purposes and must be approved by the Department of Resources.

Jessica Morden was tops with spending of her office of £27,000 because of staffing difficulties arising out of her pregnancy.

**Now consider this champagne swilling socialist Jessica for damn near 6 months was in effect out of work due to baby producing. Yet despite her half of Newport being devoid of an MP the amount this piggy hogs from our taxes go's up.

Champagne socialism from Jessica "Call me Jess" Morden in action.

Oink, Oink Oink. I offer full right of reply and be warned unlike when she oversaw the stiching up of Ron "Badger" Davies I will fight back.

Come on Jess lets hear the excuses....

Technorati Tags: expenses, labour hogs, sleaze, raping the taxpayers

.

hat tip to thethunderdragon for this one......Claire Ward has claimed the full second home allowance of £23,083 for the second year a row, despite her constituency being so close to Westminster - barely more than half an hour by public transport!

How can she possibly justify claiming so much of our money rather than have an hours worth of communting every day? Yes MPs work long hours, but that’s no excuse for charging us an extra £23,000 a year! I’m really not surprised that she voted to keep her expenses secret now know what they are.

Another grasping piggy of an MP, who looks somewhat like the pigs she emulates so so well.

Head down, curly tail up...Oink Oink Oink.

The taxpayers of Watford must be oh so proud of this champaigne swilling piglet.

Technorati Tags: expenses, labour hogs, sleaze, raping the taxpayers

.

here we go again....yet more we know better than you nonsense....A pregnant woman was refused a drink at a pub and then asked to leave by staff who said they were protecting her unborn child.

Caroline Williams, 26, who is five months pregnant, says she felt humiliated by the treatment.

She insists she is a responsible mother and would never endanger her baby.

The incident at the Cricketer pub in Hove, East Sussex, has reignited the debate on drinking during pregnancy.

Advice from the Chief Medical Officer says that women trying to conceive or who are pregnant should avoid drinking alcohol.

Excess alcohol consumption can be the cause of a condition known as Fetal Alcohol Syndrome which causes mental retardation and birth defects. But other experts say an occasional glass of wine will not harm a child.

**I blame the government for starting all this crap.

.

Nicky Campbell is a worthless Beeboid twat. That is all.

.

Grasped the max– £23,083 – on his Parliamentary allowances for the 2nd home.

A former Tory he sold out for the proerbial 30 pieces of taxpayer silver to the one eyed cunt Gordon.

Scum. Total grasping amoral parasitic scum.

Technorati Tags: expenses, labour hogs, sleaze, raping the taxpayers

.

See that dickhead hanging there, well that was loudmouthed lying Wop gobshyte Mussolini. Tomorrow that may well be Cyclops Brown, Jacqui Smith, her masterbating monkey of a husband or any other of the 600+ fucktard MP's out to fleece us blind.

I have e-mailed my MP this, a hat tip to Obotheclown

Mp's still not getting it......Defiant MPs today defended their huge expenses bills, with many declaring: “We are worth every penny”.

Dudley South MP Ian Pearson claimed the most in the region, at £150,481, followed closely by his Dudley North colleague Ian Austin, at £147,505.

The figures were revealed amid growing anger over MPs’ claims, after Home Secretary Jacqui Smith’s adult movie scandal.

Mr Austin, Minister for the West Midlands, said: “Most of these costs are to run offices, employ staff and provide a first class service.

“If you take out the costs of postage and communication I think my costs would be below average.

Technorati Tags: expenses, labour hogs, sleaze, raping the taxpayers

.

MIIIIIIIAAAAAAAAAAAAAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Technorati Tags: Jacqui Smith, Wankergate, Wankgate, Labour porn

.

From the Telegraph, Caroline Flint vacant headed Blair babe confesses her stupidity of the stuff she is supposed to know......

In a surprise confession during a House of Commons' debate, she told MPs that she had however been "briefed" on parts of the Treaty, which replaced but resembles the failed EU constitution.
Her honest declaration, which led to gasps from MPs, came after Miss Flint was asked during the debate if she had read the elements of the treaty that related to defence. She replied: "I have read some of it but not all of it."

Caroline should read the very document that she promoted to The House, the document that she is in favour of and if she unable to do that one has to ask quite what fucking use is this empty headed bimbo doing in The House of Commons?

Well fuck me - actually no thanks Caroline - but the last thing we need representing us is a dim witted skank more into Eastenders and fluff culture than high Euro politics. 

.

Health Minister Ann Keen has been confirmed as Britain's most costly MP.

Her expenses claim totalled a whopping £167,306 in the last financial year - the highest excluding transport costs, which disproportionately affect some English and Welsh and all Scottish MPs.

Her husband Alan, who represents a neighbouring seat, claimed a total of £146,408, bringing the couple's overall cost to the taxpayer to £313,714 in the last financial year - excluding travel costs.

The couple, nicknamed 'Mr and Mrs Expenses', claimed the extraordinary costs despite living just a 30-minute drive from Westminster.

**Remember come election time, they feel the pain of you poor serfs, they secretly laugh at your company collapsing thanks to their parties taxes, they mock as your home is taken off you by the banks they used your money to bail out, they giggle as you have to sign on as unemployed.

You have heard the term champagne socialism, well this is it. While you struggle to afford a pint of milk they wash down the finest booze paid for from your money.

These piggies should be hung up and have their throats cut like any ordinary pig in the slaughterhouse. Cunts, utter contemptible cunts.

Even more expenses that the Keen's are eager to hog up.

Ann Keen sued for being a lazy fat champagne socialist piggy

Technorati Tags: expenses, labour hogs, sleaze, raping the taxpayers

.

I bet she never thought this story would bite her on the arse.

"Jacqui Smith to tackle 'sexualisation' culture." says the headline in The Grauniad.

The "sexualisation" of young teenage, and even preteen, girls through clothes, videos(as watched by the husband of Jacqui Smith), and music lyrics and a possible link with sexual abuse and violence is to be the focus of a new fact-finding review ordered by the home secretary.

Jacqui Smith said that while some parents may see high-street chain stores selling Playboy t-shirts for 11-year-old girls as a "bit of fun", many other parents were concerned that their daughters were under pressure to appear sexually available at an increasingly younger age.

She said she was concerned about clothes that were inappropriate for young girls, images on computer games and videos and attitudes that were sometimes represented through music.

"It is time that manufacturers saw the writing on the wall over this and stopped producing these sort of things for young girls," said the home secretary.

Indeed and if I may ask, quite how does the image of the Home Secretary's husband hunched up pumping his fist, watching late night grumble flicks on Virgin Media wankovision come across as an image for the impressionable young girls?

Good luck with promoting that one Jacqui, I am sure that your audience will be very impressed with the moral stance that you take...

Previous posts: Search for wankergate mole begins, some wankergate mockery, a word of advice on onanism wankergate jacqui smith videos wankergate post 2  we pay for husband of Home Sec to have a tug.

Technorati Tags: Jacqui Smith, Wankergate, Wankgate, Labour porn

.

Well the one eyed snot gobbler, our unelected Gordon announced that ministers pay is to be frozen. Well that's jolly fucking decent of him when we all know that between their sleazy deals with businesses and bending the taxpayer over the table for a fiscal arse raping with regards expenses ministers are laughing all the way to the bank.

But this one eyed idiot still fails to grasp the anger out there in the real world, thats the bit not in Westminster, not even in the sleazy laden councils, or in the sealed off from reality quango's. 

He announces that MP's are to get a slight raise, this at a time when folk are losing their jobs,or having their pay frozen or cut as taxes rise. Finding their homes being seized by the banks, those same banks that we all paid to bail out by the way. 

But getting back to MP's what exactly have they done to deserve a fucking pay rise off of us, yes for we are their employers. Are we as a nation better off? No we are in recession. 

For helping themselves to expenses that would in any other job get them arrested for fraud. Claiming so much on expenses that they need not even touch the huge initial wage. Living allowances, the so called John Lewis list, second home allowance and so on. 

Even down to us paying for their porn and an 88p bathplug!

Then there is the workload, or rather lack of it. Just look at the areas farmed off to both the EU and assorted quango's that The House no longer deal with. If anything as employers we should demand a severe pay cut in the wage paid to these rather lazy state employees.

Then we come to our employees behaviour: From Jack Straw(I shall come back to this scrotum in a moment*) having an OAP turfed out for speaking out, to ignoring us over every issue, not giving a straight answer but some bland corporate newspeak.

Hell even when you write to an MP you just end up being giving some piss poor badly drafted stock answers to questions passed down from a dumbfuck minister who could not win an arse kicking contest against a one legged man.

I refer to a written question that I had back from Paul Flynn via Angela Eagle. A friend who contacted a seperate MP on the same subject (beer taxes) recieved exactly the same stock letter back. The only difference being the name of the MP drone at the bottom.

*back to the scrotum Jack Straw: On March 8th I wrote a little bit to Jack Straw's blog over at blackburnlabour, I wrote the following:

Jack, oh where to start on this. 12 years you lot have been in power and you have failed. 

The latest jape or it would be if it were funny is that of early release. 

Labour failed to get enough prisons built to house all the criminals going through the justice system. Okay they managed to stick some 3000+ laws an regulations on the statute books but as for actual prisons forget it. 

Now we find that 50,000 criminals have been let out early under the “end-of-custody licence” (ECL) system. A system brought in by one unelected James Gordon Brown, just 2 days after he became PM. 

But we are paying them as well. The way the system works (or rather doesn't)is they get out early and are rewarded for being let out early, compensated for "losing free board and lodging". 

Now when I was broken into where was my compensation for loss of earnings due to having to take time off work, my compensation for lost goods? 

None, oh they did catch him and he got a slap across the wrist, not even a fine. Me I got fined through higher contents insurance premiums.

As of today not a peep from Jack Straw, not an e-mail, not a call nothing. 

Now some might argue he is not my MP, but he did set up a blog to debate - although he has done very little of that - if an employee and that is what Jack is does that, should not the employers become a tad irate?

Then we come to lying something these employees are rather good at. Lets face it have a quick knee trembler with some slapper in the office - an office we pay for by the way - then lying to the boss and attempting to cover up said sleazy antics would get you fired from most jobs I can think of.

I mean its not the first time they have lied is it, we had the sexed up dossiers over Iraq and the campagn of Chinese whispers against weapons expert Dr David Kelly until he was driven to his death.

Plus that vote on Euope. Would have been nice after all it was stuck in the promises that they made before election. So yet again our employees have lied to us.

Then we have their looting of pensions, whilst gold plating their own. One of the reasons many vote is to protect pensions, well they fucked that one.

Then we come to liberties and boy do they take them(from us mostly). Trainspotters and tourists confused with terrorists by the police? Anyone taking a photo subject to search under terror laws. The plastic policemen pushing them around. Council snoops inspecting bins.

Tax upon tax upon tax and yet no representation on taxes. The calls for banning anything they enjoy but deem us not responsible enough to enjoy. The weight of policing coming down on citizens for petty infractions whilst letting out dangerous driving peers after little more than 2 weeks.

An open immigration policy and the branding of those who speak out as racist? Whilst showing contempt in monitoring our travel plans, the tracking our movements, our internet use, e-mails and so on. 

Then the bullshit is produced that if we have nothing to hide we have nothing to fear. Yet they do their best to stop us seeing where our employees live, keep themselves off of databases and regard us as little more than plebs and proles.

As an employer I say to them that they have failed: Failed on every aspect from crime, education, employment, immigration, terrorism, defence of the realm, even down to that most basic of requirments of any employee honesty.

I challenge any MP to counter these points.

Technorati Tags: expenses, labour hogs, sleaze, raping the taxpayers

.

You know when one looks at the utter shit spewed forth my many of the Rt Hon. Members of the Commons, occasionally a gem comes along, okay it was on the MP's blog but good none the less: http://www.talkcarswell.com/show.aspx?id=597
A is for .... Accountable, something many of our MPs are not.
B is for ... Ballot, the lottery process used to decide which lucky MP gets to ask ministers a question, to maintain the fiction that government is Accountable (see A above).
C is for ... Commons Committees, and all their spineless, executive-controlled futility.
D is for ... Directives, the rules (issued despite Westminster) which really decide how Britain's governed.
E is for .... Executive power, once held by those answerable to Parliament, now in the hands of Quangos (see Q below).
F is for .... Fed-up, something most voters now are.
G is for .... Guillotine motion, a procedure used to prevent MPs doing their job whenever any are so inclined.
H is for .... Hansard, that record of ministerial evasion and bluster.
I is for .... Indefensible
J is for .... Joke
K is for .... Knighthoods, once awarded for achievement, now dished out for .... best not ask.
L is for .... Legislature, something the Commons once was, but now fails to be.
M is for .... Mr Michael Martin, the Speaker, who presides over it all.
N is for ... Not-to-blame, as in “the minister followed official advice”.
O is for ... Order, order!
P is for ... Pocket, as in “the Commons is in the pocket of government”.
Q is for ... Quango, the unaccountable institutions that really run Britain
R is for ... Right of Recall and Referendum, as in the direct democracy we need to make our politicians work for us.
S is for ... Smug, self-satisfied, self-regarding SW1.
T is for ... Turnout, something that's fallen to an all time low at elections.
U is for ... Useless, as in the House of Commons
V is for ... Vanity, which stops many elected ministers 'fessing up to the fact they no longer count for much.
W is for ... Whitehall, which is to Westminster what puppet-master is to puppet.
X is for ... The mark our forbearers once struggled to have the right to place on ballot papers.
Y is for ... Why does it have to be this way? Other countries have proper legislatures.
Z is for ... The grade I give our broken Westminster system after four years there as an MP.

.

.

From the Daily Mail...Fucking hell MP's just don't get it, they fail to understand both the issue and that people are annoyed at this.

Unlike them when people put in expenses they usually have a grilling to find out on what it is being spent, unlike them they fail to get first class travel paid for, unlike them they fail to have their utility bills paid for.

If they are lucky a business person may get a small allowance for a meal and some drinks, but not the £400 month stuff your face with kebabs allowance that Jacqui and all other MP's get.

We don't get a £24K second home allowance and have to furnish our humble hovels ourselves out of our wages, thats the wage we earn and not the allowance which MP's use.

Let me give a example of an MP missing the point, this from Paul Flynn:

Jacqui Smith said she "mistakenly" claimed for a TV package when billing for a web connection and would repay the cash. The receipt was shown on television. How did the receipt sent by the MP to the Fees Office fall into the hands of the press? there are a million receipts received by the Fees Office every year.
Finding one as incriminating as this requires meticulous research.
The likely explanation is that there is a Tory mole in the Commons leaking receipts. By an amazing coincidence all the leaks have been damaging to Labour. That suggests a political motive.
No, he is wrong and I shall explain why. 

Had I, having paid my own way to work out of my wages. Not in some taxpayer funded car or on a freebie taxpayer funded rail ticket; seen that the Home Sec. had put in a claim for some grumble flicks on wankovision I would have reported her.

I would not care a flying fuck if said Home Sec. was Labour, Tory or of any other party. The fact is that her husband was sat down kitchen towel in hand - and I bet we paid for that paper towel as well!- pumping his fist and we were paying for his onanism.

If I may digress a second, Eric Pickles(Tory) showed himself to be a grasping amoral cuntmonkey and if Cameron had actually had his bollocks drop would rip him a new one and kick him out of the fucking party.

And now back to pornstar Jacqui, rather than said grumble films, whats more annoying is the whole damn cable package is paid for by the taxpayer as well.

The dim witted woman stuck the claim in along with God alone how many more and figured she would get away with it. A read of what has been put out shows that she is willing and sees it as her right to claim an 88p bath plug as she no doubt thought a few jizz films at £5 a pop was small change.

Now MP's are well paid, throw in the expenses and they can claim all the living expenses that the rest of us have to pay out without touching their wages.

Technorati Tags: Jacqui Smith, Wankergate, Wankgate, Labour porn

.

Crossposted from Brew Wales,

The former King pub on Somerton Road, Lliswerry, Newport is in the process of being demolished to make way for flats. 

Once known as the King of Prussia, it became the King of Russia in 1916 but was just the King by 1923, although the pub sign still had "Frederick William III 1797-1840" on it until recently. 

The King was owned by local brewers Phillips, who sold out to Courage but in more recent times it became a freehouse, run by Newport AFC. The pub has been closed and derelict for a number of years, as with the nearby Black Horse which is awaiting demolition to be turned into a supermarket. 

Shame about the King, it was a nice piece of nineteenth century architecture with its tilled frontage. Another Newport pub lost, that's 42 local pubs closed since New Labour came to power in 1997.

A vote for Labour is a vote for the destruction of our heritage, fewer local pubs and fewer local jobs.

.

A hat tip to The Cynical Dragon for the latest stupidity from ancient past his sell by date MP Paul Flynn(Labour).

Local lying MP Paul Flynn - he lost a libel case as his wikipedia page shows.- has been boasting about the number of hits that crap webshyte Aneurin Glyndwr is getting 

He crows "The new website Aneurin Glyndwr is off to a triumphant start with 9,000 hits in the first day." 

Well so what? Mostly due to a fucking piss poor song and lots of internet mockery on the part of bloggers Plus if you have the perma tanned twat Peter Hain lording it to the high heavens on the telly box then people will take a look.

I wonder if he will be crowing about its stats in six months time?

Still that's a lot more than the 2000 hits or so a week Mr Flynn gets. And no I won't link to Flynn as I will not help boost his stats.

He stated that figure in some fluff circular he put out at taxpayers expense the other week.

Maybe he could also boast of the thousand of hits the spam forums on Labour 2020 get next?

Still what can we expect from a proven liar who hates farmers and jokes about their suicides.

.

Blue movies on expenses, this is just so wrong....Home Secretary Jacqui Smith’s political future was in jeopardy tonight after it was revealed that her husband used her Commons expenses allowance to pay to watch pornographic films.

Previous wank gate posts on dim witted, bovine faced, slack jawed, expense fiddling, 2nd home claiming, kebab eating, Home (economics) Sec. Jacqui Smith:Some advice on onanism, wank-gate jacqui smith videos jacqui smith wankgate another mocking post The story breaks and I start mocking.

Technorati Tags: Jacqui Smith, Wankergate, Wankgate, Labour porn

.

A doffed cap to the Devil, who pointed out the rather poor state of the New Labour Wales site: wales 2020.

They claim:

Welsh politics. Done differently.

How does that work then? The answer is - very simply indeed.

Wales 20:20 is a new organisation with one main aim, namely to facilitate wide-ranging and inclusive debate under the ‘democratic socialist’ banner in Wales. Committed to renewing the Labour movement across Wales and remoulding the Welsh Labour Party as a policy driven, campaign minded organisation, we are governed by three simple principles:

1. To promote debate on a democratic socialist future for Wales;

2. To energise and renew the Welsh Labour Movement towards achieving its full potential, through winning the battle of ideas on Wales’s future;

3. To provide a forum for dialogue with progressives throughout Wales, working for a progressive consensus supportive of Welsh Labour’s vision for the future of Wales.

The essays, pamphlets and articles, commissioned by Wales 20:20 from some of the sharpest minds in left of centre Welsh politics, will start that debate. Our new blog with comments section, launching April 2009, will then enable others to discuss the issues fully.

But that’s quite enough of the talking. Let’s start the debate.

Okay, lets as you say start the debate.
How about the "General Discussion" forum? Sounds good. 

Such topics as "exploring my sexuality with older guys" - Must be some Peter Mandelson forum!

Or maybe "latina sex movies", always a big discussion point in the Welsh valleys I am sure. I don't think Harriet Harperson would approve of that.

How about "skinny girls fat guys naughty girls from mars" whatever that involves?

Maybe "Jesse james holiday 39"

Plus my favorite topic "Piper had never failed to make a girl happy with her tongue" - Sounds like a film Mr Jacqui Smith might be ordering off of Virgin Media grumble films tonight.

The Common Endeavours forum looks interesting, lets take a look at what they are doing there:

First up possible illegal software with "search torrent-tracker site", oh dear.

Plus "college girls are easy", not very pc this site is it?

Plus quite a few posts in some East European script.

And so it go's on, page after page of naught stuff, download ringtones, trackers, cheap meds etc etc.

Including the very strange "big breasts teens glasses cat girl cum"

Every page in every forum as far as I could see was spam type rubbish. Amusing an well worth a look just for the mockery value alone.

Page after page after page an not a tree hugger, eco loon, class warrior, unemployed chap with a bad back honest from Merthyr Tydil honest guv' to be seen.

.

The last of the tractorstats photoshops have been put onto Youtube with some tunes.

The Others are here and of course here. They are also on line http://picasaweb.google.com/TractorStats/

Needless to say the late tratorstats blog is missed, whilst Gordon the snotgobblin, trouserpissing cunt is still sadly very much alive and with us.

.

I have been meaning to lay into this over rated icon of shittiness for a while now.

No bluetooth. Seriously what the fucking hell were they thinking of? How in the name of all that is fucking holy can you put a phone out on the market place without (A2DP)?

Come on you meet someone and want to swap the business card with their date of birth etc on the phone. Apple give you the proverbial fuck you. 

Look my phone which is a few years old can do this no bother, ping the card across and they have phone/email/web address the lot. 

Never mind the far more common swapping of drunken clips and sundry crap whilst out in the pub. 

One thing I do, is use the phone I have as a data store. Dump files on it and then bluetooth them over, bloody great for swapping something like a PDF without all the messing about with PC's. Yet Apple seem to regard users of (A2DP) as pirates.

Apparently this steaming luddite pile lacks all of the following:

Advanced Audio Distribution Profile (A2DP)
Audio/Video Remote Control Profile (AVRCP)
Basic Imaging Profile (BIP)
Basic Printing Profile (BPP)
Cordless Telephony Profile (CTP)
Device ID Profile (DID)
Dial-up Networking Profile (DUN)
Fax Profile (FAX)
File Transfer Profile (FTP)
General Audio/Video Distribution Profile (GAVDP)
Generic Access Profile (GAP)
Generic Object Exchange Profile (GOEP)
Human Interface Device Profile (HID)
Intercom Profile (ICP)
Object Push Profile (OPP)
Personal Area Networking Profile (PAN)
Phone Book Access Profile (PBAP)
Serial Port Profile (SPP)
Service Discovery Application Profile (SDAP)
SIM Access Profile (SAP,SIM)
Synchronisation Profile (synch)
Video Distribution Profile (vdp)
Wireless Application Protocol Bearer (WAPB)

Oh an no MMS either? Come on you must be having a laugh, the ability to pop a photo across a phone system is not difficult any more. When something funny happens, everyone with the crappy old Nokia can grab a pic and forward it, whilst the i-Phone user just has to sit down an munch on Steve Job's tool.

Lack of video. Oh come on now Apple, that is just taking the piss to be fair. You mean to say that this all singing all dancing stone age device can not film? Something which a crappy £25 phone from Smack Generator can do. See above re the remark about munching on Mr Jobs tool.

No customising ringtones either with your MP3's.  Again Mr Jobs tool time.

Lastly no copy & paste. Yep, see Mr jobs.

Now could some cynical fucker at Apple have thought, I know we shall sell them a lifestyle product over something that is actually useful. 

Oh and yes I am aware the new O/S is out soon, sort of like charging everyone for a car and letting them know that it only has 2 wheels and the others will be out in June.

.

Over to Harvey Denton, from the League of Gentlemen:

While the wee wife's away just a few words on the subject of onanism. In this house…we don’t masturbate. It’s not a very pleasant thing to do, particularly with one's good lady wife having to file the expenses, is it? I’d hate to think of either Jacqui or her sister tearing downstairs first thing in the morning, only to find you, hunched double on the sofa bed…pumping your fist watching Virgin Media porn. So, while you’re a guest with us, if you could reign in those baser instincts, if you don’t mind, Richard, please?

The original script was:

While the wee wife's away just a few words on the subject of onanism. In this house, we don't masturbate. It's not a particularly pleasant thing to do, especially with two young girls running around now is it? I would hate to imagine either Chloe or Radcliffe, tearing down the stairs first thing in the morning, only to find you, hunched double on the sofa bed pumping your fist!

A poem that I found over at Saxon Times
I spend my lonely weeks in London
Working for Gordon Brown
And crash out on my sister’s floor
Just as the sun goes down
On Friday nights I head back home,
My second home that is,
To spend some time with my true love
And get some married bliss

Dick’s waiting for me in Redditch,
Get me there driver soon
I want to lie in his strong arms
And go into a swoon
I want to collect his DNA
For my own database
I want to open my bursting blouse
And thrust them in his face

On Friday night when I got home
My second home that is,
Dick said he was all shagged out
And just gave me a kiss
On that fateful Sunday morning,
I read it in the press
Dick’s been watching some dirty films
And got us in a mess

It seems he’s been paying five quid
For “Dirty Debutantes”
Despite what’s bursting from my blouse
It’s not me that he wants
No Tarantino, no Scorsese,
No Bergmann, no Kubrick
You can’t beat old J Arthur
Says naughty, naughty Dick

Now I’m the two homes secretary
And hold the highest rank
But Dick he isn’t that impressed
He’d rather have a wank
Another Monday morning dawns
I’m heading back to town
The saddest thing is that I’ll be
Working for Gordon Brown

Oh Dick! Oh Dick! You stupid prick
I don’t mind pay to view
But you claimed it on expenses
And gave the press their cue
Next Friday when I come back home
My second home that is
I’ll be expecting rather more
Than just a friendly kiss
Technorati Tags: Jacqui Smith, Wankergate, Wankgate, Labour porn

.

First up this gem from GOT - Wankergate 3, which I have popped onto Youtube. 

Next up The Screech has this one. Copied the HTML bollocks malarky from The Screech

The embed code is: object id="BLOG_video-954ec70c8cee6cdd" class="BLOG_video_class" width="395" height="328" contentid="954ec70c8cee6cdd"> oh just add one of these < at the start else it fucks up like a Labour Minister claiming porn flicks.
Oh the joy of mocking this self serving money grasping bint.

No kebab is safe!

Above a couple of movies Mr Jacqui Smith might want to consider getting, rather than claiming his grumble films off of the taxpayers of this land.

Technorati Tags: Jacqui Smith, Wankergate, Wankgate, Labour porn

Post two, first post

.

The excuses begin:
The Home Secretary, already embroiled in an expenses row, submitted the bill as part of a £67 claim for television services in June last year.

She promised to repay the money. In a statement she said: “I am sorry that in claiming for my internet connection, I mistakenly claimed for a television package alongside it.

“As soon as the matter was brought to my attention, I took immediate steps to contact the relevant parliamentary authorities and rectify the situation. All money claimed for the television package will be paid back in full.”

A source close to Ms Smith, 46, said last night that she had not been at the family home in Redditch, Worcestershire, on April 1 and April 6 last year when the adult films were viewed.

So it was not a mutual hand shandy then. A case of a lonely hubby watching Jacqui does Dallas maybe?

The source said she was “furious” with her husband, adding: “She was not watching these films, has never watched them and is horrified that this would end up anywhere near a taxpayer-related claim.”

Oh come on, does she really expect us to swallow that, she would claim everything even down to the fucking proverbial kitchen sink. Oh she did!

Ms Smith has claimed for virtually every major household item over the past five years, right down to the kitchen sink

Jacqui who earns £141,866-a-year as a piss poor minister, even claimed for an 88p bath plug, maybe she confused that with a butt plug?

So not only does she pay her hubby as an assistant- although to be more accurate as taxpayers we pay for her hubby - but gets the taxpayer to pays for his hand relief when she is kipping over at her sisters house and claiming dubious expenses for that.

Another troughligate MP, screwing the taxpayer and spunking taxpayers cash away - literally in this case.

I wonder if we as taxpayers were even charged for the kitchen towels used to clean up his jizz?

So think about this whilst Mr Jacqui Smith was having his jollies watching wankovison not only were we paying for his grumble flick but the sofa bed he was laying on whilst having said wank.

Link to Wankgate post 1

Technorati Tags: Jacqui Smith, Wankergate, Wankgate, Labour porn

.

http://jamesholden.net/billboard/

.

Blue movies on expenses, this is just so wrong....Home Secretary Jacqui Smith’s political future was in jeopardy tonight after it was revealed that her husband used her Commons expenses allowance to pay to watch pornographic films.

Richard Timney(Mr Jacqui Smith and letter scribbler for his wife), who works as Ms Smith’s Commons adviser, used part of the Minister’s second-homes allowance to pay for the blue movies he watched on a subscription television channel.

The relationship between Ms Smith and her husband was said by Government insiders to be ‘very difficult,’ but stressed that the couple were still together.
It is understood that Mr Timney had been watching explicit adult movies on channels broadcast on the Virgin Media cable TV service.

The scandal revolves around an invoice on which Mr Timney is believed to have made the expenses claims. Subscribers to the service can access X-rated films on the Playboy Channel, the Adult Channel and Television X for around £11 a month. It is also possible to order adult channels on a pay-per-night basis for £5.

Tory MP Philip Davies said last night that if the porn-movie claims were true, the Home Secretary would have to resign.

‘Claiming that her sister’s back bedroom is her main home is one thing but this could push her over the cliff. It is surely not legitimate to use Commons’ second-home allowances to buy blue movies. If this is true, I cannot see how she can survive.’

The revelation comes as The Mail on Sunday launches a petition to demand a full enquiry into MPs' expenses.

Another Troughligate story. 

Well I knew it would not be long before the bovine faced, slack jawed, dim witted, kebab eating, expense fiddling piss poor excuse for an MP and bloody shoddy Home (economics) Sec. Jacqui landed in the shit again but even by her standards this is quick. 

Maybe not as quick as her husband having a quick one off the wrist but damn quick either way.

Now whichever way you look at this there is no way we should be funding cable for MP's, least of all for the "relaxation" of MP's husbands having a hand shandy. 

Not really an image I want to picture either, but she as the one claiming our money should ensure it is spent in a reasonable and professional manner, not "spunked up against the wall" - sorry could not resist that jibe.

Hell its not as if she has not had enough on her plate what with dragging her feet over the cases of Gurkha soldiers, despite the High Court stating they could be allowed into the UK and allowing them to die. Then there is her spot a terrorist bullshit poster campaign. Oh and yet another tedious threat announcement. Plus setting up a latter day home guard to protect us from Alky Ada.

Plus that tedious bull about a useless abuse register.

Her decided to do sod all in real terms about kicking out islamist goat herders whilst making it ever more difficult for skilled migrants to enter the UK.

Hell I have not even started on ID cards yet, talking of which her dubious claims that we all wanted them oh so badly we would be happy to pre-register.

She stands there with that empty bovine expression on her face, as I said before

With Jacqui I would say that her bovine face has something of 10 Rillington Place about it.

Then she has been getting some flack over her expenses having grabbed somewhere in the region of £232,000 in tax free additional allowances by claiming that her sister's spare bedroom is her main residence.  

If that is true no wonder hubby was watching wankovision.

According to reports she was reported by her neighbours with regards her dubious expense claims.

She also employs members of her family, or to be accurate we do as we pay for them. Hell we are even paying for their wanking now!

Although credit where credit is due she did kick out islamic fucknut called Ibrahim Moussawi, but I shall negate that off the score sheet for kicking out Geert Wilders.

Finally we had the whole fiasco of her kebab gate story.

Technorati Tags: Jacqui Smith, Wankergate, Wankgate, Labour porn

.

Just look at that red face, one bottle of fine wine to many over the years methinks. No following of HM Govt booze guidlines for him judging by that red face. 

Looks like he has been having the recommended 5 a day, as well as someone elses as well.

Well our Ken and he is ours sadly as we pay his wages, has been fooling about on Early Day Motion put forward by Marsha Singh MP (Labour) - The EDM was calling for St Georges Day to be made a national holiday.

Ken joked adding this: at end add `; but notes that the dragon had devoured a number of working-class young women and it was only when a princess was threatened that George thought it worthwhile taking action.’.

Ah yes a "class warrior" joke from the champagne swilling New Labour pig. No doubt a witty aside on his wobbly way back from one of the bars in the House that's subsidized by the taxpayers.

But as if that were not bad enough our red faced "brother" has also signed an EDM offering support for Fidel Castro.

Here it is a document that shames the very values of the House of Commons:

EDM 982

FIDEL CASTRO

20.02.2008

Burgon, Colin

That this House commends the achievements of Fidel Castro in securing first-class free healthcare and education provision for the people of Cuba despite the 44 year illegal US embargo of the Cuban economy; notes the great strides Cuba has taken during this period in many fields such as biotechnology and sport in both of which Cuba is a world leader; acknowledges the esteem in which Castro is held by the people and leaders of Africa, Asia and Latin America for leading the calls for emancipation of the world's poorest people from slavery, hunger and the denial of human rights such as the right to life, the right to shelter, the right to healthcare and basic medicines and the right to education; welcomes the EU statement that constructive engagement with Cuba at this time is the most responsible course of action; and calls upon the Government to respect Cuba's right to self-determination and resist the aggressive forces within the US Administration who are openly planning their own illegal transition in Cuba.

Which is quite the opposite to what is happening in Cuba, as the case of Normando Hernández González shows Cuba is nothing more than a soviet style gulag with palm trees: Link:http://www.newstatesman.com/200711080021

Plus: http://www.rsf.org/article.php3?id_article=6917
Also: http://www.pen.org/viewmedia.php/prmMID/912/prmID/174

Not that our bloated fat MP Ken cares, so long as he gets his taxpayer funded food and drink.

In 2006/07 Ken cleared a cool £126,502 quid in expenses, enough for quite a few steak an ale pies. No wonder he has such a red face!

Not that he wants us to know what bloated MP's like himself are getting upto, as he voted to protect MP's from prying eyes. Not that with his weight he is easily missed!

He also voted for 42 days, as well as voting for the £24K second home allowance.

Keep on joking Ken, one day the voters will turf the useless time serving, authoritarian cunts like yourself out. On a personal view I would like him strung up from a lamp post, although I do believe that would require a team of horses to shift his bulk.

.

Well aside from being an amoral rat, Nigel is not very bright either. 

Rather than do the decent thing and resign, find a quiet room with a bottle of whisky and a service revolver an redecorate the back wall a nice shade of brain; Nigel decides to try to cover up the tale of his infidelity.

The News of the Screws as its jokingly called has this tale of a dim witted MP closing the stable door...

DISGRACED sex romp MP Nigel Griffiths was covered in yet more shame last night-after a High Court Judge REJECTED his bid to SILENCE the News of the World's TRUE revelations of his antics inside the House of Commons.

The married former Labour minister attempted to get a legal injunction to gag us. But he failed and was SLAMMED by the judge.

Even though lying cheat Griffiths took dozens of pornographic pictures of his brunette mistress cavorting in his House of Commons office, then downloaded them on to his computer, he later claimed he was so drunk he could hardly remember the sex session.

But yesterday Mr Justice King damned Griffiths as he declared: "At the very least, he was being economical with the truth. It could be said to be a lie but I don't have to go that far."

The Judge also said the News of the World was RIGHT to expose Griffiths' shocking behaviour in his taxpayer-funded Westminster office, adding: "I accept the fact that the claimant has not only taken pictures but also downloaded them does not sit easily with his public statement that he is ashamed and has little recollection."

On Thursday, Griffiths thought he was in the clear after the Commons' Standards Commissioner dismissed complaints about the MP-without even questioning him or asking US for our evidence.

But yesterday the High Court judge concluded:

"It is legitimate to bring into the public domain the totality of the material. There is a clear public office element.

I accept there is a legitimate interest of the public in the way MPs use access to offices that they get as a result of their public office.

There is a right to prevent the public from being significantly misled. The paper should be free to put the record straight as to what the claimant said in response to the article.

Previous posts here is post 2 and post 1.

 As Nigel has a very small "majority" its looking likely that come voter turnout time he will be removed from office. Good riddance to bad rubbish the House of Commons deserves better, rather than dubious MP's leaving "emissions" on the furniture.

.

Well I always said he was shit, that he was full of shit and as if proof was ever needed that this was the case, thanks to The Crown who spotted this latest gem.

Sky report that the photo opp with Gordon Brown's South American chums was delayed because he was having a dump:

The "family photo" at the progressive government conference almost became a minor diplomatic incident when our own PM didn't turn up.

It was shrugging shoulders and puzzled expressions all round as the eight became seven.

Five minutes later, Gordon hove into view and the snappers snapped away.

Those on the scene tell me he'd been to the toilet.

Can he show up this nation any more, that he was unable to work out that he needed a crap and go before the photo shoot.

Still thanks to Oldbagsplace for the cyclopedian bog roll.

Related post, I am No.1 for calling Gordon Brown shit on Google.

.

Ah the BBC bless them, ever the ones to repeat mantra style government stats and do their best to talk down to the taxpayers.

So what better way to educate that take a figure from literature and rewrite them as black.

Friar Tuck has been viewed for centuries as a roly-poly, comic addition to Robin of Sherwood's band of merry men. But in the latest BBC series of Robin Hood, which begins tonight, he has been reinvented as a black martial arts expert, to the fury of historians.

David Harewood, the new Friar Tuck, who starred in the BBC thriller Criminal Justice, admitted that this reincarnation of the character had seemed ridiculous to him at first. “I actually laughed,” he said.

Historians are less amused about the casting of Friar Tuck, who is usually played by short, fat, balding white men. There had been rumours that Matt Lucas, the star of Little Britain, would get the role.

Helen Phillips, Professor of English at Cardiff University and an expert in medieval literature, said: “Sub-Saharan Africans wouldn't have been converted by that point, they would have had other religions. North Africans would have mostly been Muslims.

Ah but say the red rimmed glass wearing liberals at the BBC it is fiction don't you know. Plus we get to look down at the white majority portray a positive ethnic role model.

“Also, friars came from upper-class families, as did monks. The kind of families from which friars were drawn wouldn't have been in any sense African.”

Harewood, who was the first black actor to play Othello at the National Theatre, said that he had been persuaded of the merits of the radical interpretation of the character.

“They sent me the character breakdown and it was very different from what I expected. It was a welcome change and something I really felt was going to be exciting,” he said. “Funnily enough, when I first saw Robin Hood when it started three years ago, I thought they'd missed a trick and that they should have had a black character in it. It turns out that I am the black character, so I think it adds a modern dimension to it, as well. I think viewers will really take to it: at least I hope they will.”
In the first episode of the new series, at 6.50pm on BBC One, Tuck has abandoned his mission to the Holy Land and returns to England with the hope of resurrecting the legend of Robin Hood. However, he finds the country a different place. Harewood said: “He wants England to be a place of hope but he comes back to find that the people are slightly broken, much like they are now with the credit crunch.

Ah so our black friar after killing moslims in the middle east, now go's on to tackle the latter day evil New Labour lot?

“The people need a hero, and that's what Tuck very much wants: to stand behind a symbol of good.”

Hero? But he has just been following the call by Pope Urban to kill the infidels, liberate the Christian holy lands from the infidel and all that...Oh sorry I forgot we are dumping historic fact.

But viewers will at first be led to believe that the friar is a tricksy, brooding character with more on his mind than simply helping the battle against the Sheriff of Nottingham.

“If he did have an ulterior motive, I think it would be to make the country a republic,” Harewood said. “He's not necessarily in love with the country at all. He's very much for the people, by the people, and, if it was up to him, he'd get rid of the monarchy and make it a republic. He wants the people to govern and the people to be happy.

A republic? WTF? No doubt led by a brooding fat commie with one eye and no sense of liberties, just or giving the plebs a vote on Europe even when promised in the election manifesto...

.

During the last quarter of 2008, the UK economy declined 1.5 percent. On an annualised basis, that represents over 6 percent fall in activity.

So far, the UK has clocked up three straight quarters of negative growth.

This is what a vote for Labour equals, banks in the shit, record debt levels, declining income from business, more unemployed.

Even the South American's are mocking the one eyed snot gobbling trouser pisser. 

For fucks sake nations that used to be mocked as basket cases laughing their latin arses off at us thanks to that fucking twat.

Then there is this little gem of our debt as a nation, given to us from the one eyd dim witted fiscal world saver(left):

According to the Office of National Statistics, at the end of last year, UK gross external debt stood at ₤6.4 trillion.

£6.4 f'ing trillion quid and rising and with fuck all to show for it. A health service staffed with bean counters rather than doctors & nurses, a failing civil service that provides poorer service year on year, more non jobs, a decline in roads, rail and other transport. 

.