Carol Vorderman

One of those strange Brit people who for some unknown reason become fucking huge in their native country, whilst the rest of the planet looks at them and thinks why?

Carol is one of them people and I have to say as irritating as a dose of untreated piles. Voderman is best known over here in the UK for her appearance on Channel 4 afternoon snorefest Countdown, which so I am informed has been sending old folk to sleep since 1982. The so called "flagship" of Channel 4, first program they broadcast and still going.

Not that those waiting to shuffle off to meet their maker make up all the viewer base, pervy dads(a quick hand shandy before wife and kids get back from classes after school) and lonely widowers(as per the pervy dads really) making up the remainder.

Above we see a thong shot from a fan site! Proves my point about her er, admirers.

Carol is just another giggly type of female tv presenter, with no personality that comes across in any way shape or form and a bloody irritating voice to boot. Each day the social misfits that make up the contestants come on, these are the sort of people who really should not be allowed out unattended. There is another counter argument that many of the socially inept will be at home when she is on tv, see the bit above re the pervy dads and widowers.

Mind you it stood her well as in 2000 Carol was given an MBE, I think for working with the socially inept? But I may be wrong as per the reason for the MBE.

Aside from being the giggly eye candy for the middle aged/oldies, she makes adverts.

Seriously millions of the fuckers. Turn on a TV over here in the UK and at some point Carol will come on chirping away about loans for homeowners. You know the sort of thing, fall behind and the company take your house, sell your wife off to Arabic slavers and the kids to a middle eastern pedophile ring.
You see her one "talent" and I use the word fucking loosely with regards her, aside from having an irritating voice is that she can add up, that's it. She adds up like a calculator on speed and so lots of shady loan companies hire her to hawk their various shyte financial services and products. Loan companies figure that she is giving their shoddy products a touch of respectability
Aside from a spot of corporate whoring for the finance companies, she has done the spin off videos and books, even bloody computer games. It used to be that you could escape the shitehawkes on the tv with a simple trip to the book shop, alas now we see her crap on sale in the local Waterstones:

• How Mathematics Works
• Carol Vorderman's Guide to the Internet
• Carol Vorderman's Guide to Maths
• Carol Vorderman's Pop Times Tables
• Carol Vorderman's Detox Diet
• Carol Vorderman's How To Do Sudoku, 2005
• Carol Vorderman's Massive Book Of Sudoku, 2005
• Carol Vorderman's Guide to Fleecing the Gullible, 2007(ok I made that one up)
• Carol Vorderman's Gives Grandad a Handjob, 2008(and this one)
  

**Quick update here with this clip. MILF no further comment needed.

In short the woman has coined in a vast hoard probably not far off that made by the woman who did the Harry Potter books, and she has infected tv with her annoying voice outside of her program base. Give some up and coming actress/actor a crack at the loan adverts I say, after all they need the money.
Says it all really.
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Countdown
Channel 4

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