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Stating the bleedin obvious: Kebabs make you fat "shocker"

Doner kebabs sold in the UK contain "shocking" levels of salt, fat and calories, a survey has concluded.

Officers from 76 councils sampled 494 kebabs to test their nutritional value, during the Local Authority Coordinators of Regulatory Services (Lacors) study.

The average doner they tested contained almost 1,000 calories - half a woman's recommended daily intake.

Geoffrey Theobald, of Lacors, said: "The level of saturated fat and salt in some is a serious cause for concern."

Oh for fucks sake, the only - repeat only - reason anyone has a doner is after a gallon or two of ale down the local pub. For some reason the beer logic takes over an stopping off at the local Turkish dubious meat emporium becomes a must have.

Thats the same beer logic that makes people have sex with ugly folk, think they are fucking invincible an be killed doing stupid shit, or think that JD Wetherspoon pubs are worth drinking in.

Kebabs exist for the sole reasons of soaking up said ale oh an to make a modern art design on the pavement.

Closely followed by said drunk being arrested for drunk & disorderly for heaving his kebab up all over the policeman's shoes.

Why do they need to waste money to state facts that even the dimmist of chav-scum, or Jacqui Smith on a good day would be able to work out. Still any excuse for the state non-jobs to spunk our tax monies up against the nearest wall, along with all the up-chucked kebabs.

**Still we all know someone who has been chowing down on lots of kebabs - other than our fat arsed Home Sec. Jacqui Smith that is - yep our very own Mr Brown. 

Look at him there waddling along, double chins a wobbling, tongue out gasping for air. Fucker looks like you can see the arteries hardening as we speak.


2 people have spoken:

it's either banned or compulsory said...

Yup, I knew that as a pissed up 15 year old. BBC Radio One FM joined in in its' usual downbeat way with an expose on how much beef or even pork might be found in a suppossedly lamb kebab.
Whaddaya mean lamb kebab, I fucking hate lamb ! Cheap meat for old losers.

Oldrightie said...

Brown once famously exclaimed "I'm not gay!"
More recently he screamed "I'm not fat".
Pretty close to coming out if you ask me!