Baitullah Mehsud will not be attending Friday prayers.

Killed by a US pilotless drone. The U.S. had offered a reward of $5million (£3million) for information leading to Mehsud's location or arrest. The Pakistan government put an additional $615,000 bounty on his head.

Baitullah Mehsud turns up in Heaven and he knocks on the Pearly Gates and St. Peter opens them. "Yes?" asks St. Peter.

"I am here for Jesus", says Baitullah.

St Peter turns around and shouts, "Jesus, your taxi's here!"

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