When vandals damaged Andy Bevan's car, he thought he was doing the sensible thing by visiting his local police station to report the attack.
But to his astonishment, he was told he could not register the crime in person - and had to make a telephone call instead.
A community support officer handed Mr Bevan, 57, a card and asked him to ring the number on it.
And the matter took another bizarre twist when Mr Bevan duly stepped outside to make the call on his mobile phone - and an officer came out to tell him he could use a phone inside the station.
Mr Bevan, a retired industrial chemist, described the attitude of Humberside Police as 'ridiculous'.
He said he visited Peeler House station in Hessle, near Hull, after his tyres were damaged because he wanted the culprits caught and wasn't concerned about getting a crime number for an insurance claim.
However, he was told only the command centre could deal with the incident - and not the officers at the station.
He said: 'I told the PCSO at the counter my car was vandalised last night. He said words to the effect "have you rung?"
'I said I'd just popped in to report it, and he said, "you can't just pop in, you have to ring".
PCSO's, utterly useless pen pushing tossers. Thanks Labour for wasting 100's of millions of pounds on the useless PCSO's.